Last week NBC DATELINE aired HOPE & HEARTBREAK Adoption Scams. This is the second news story they have done in the last few years. As a news show it did its job informing those who are not on the adoption journey. But those of us watching who have gone through it or afraid it will happen to them, well it was not enough.
How can you express to viewers the pain that can come from the loss or failure from adoption scammers. Adoption is so emotional from all sides. The hours of calls where you hold onto every word the scammer is telling you. The vulnerability! You are completely at the mercy of someone at the other end of the phone or email. You spend your time dreaming of your forever family and what things you will do when your child finds you. You realize that when you start this process that it may be heartbreak at the end BUT you prepare the best you can and wait. But when the heartbreak comes from a fake scamming situation and not the one that you have prepared for, then you feel depleted and more vulnerable than before.
There was one couple that said that they lost $30,000 and it was their life savings. So what does that mean? That poor couple will have to learn to live with being childless. They will go through the rest of their lives knowing the one shot they took screwed them. News reporting takes the emotion out of it for me. Listen I think it was great that the topic was brought up and shown that it is happening – but I think we need laws to be changed in this area so badly and maybe news shows can delve into that and see why a scammer cannot be charged! Or what laws can be set in place to protect potential adoptive families.
Scammers take the beauty out of this process and shine such a bad light on it. There are so many opinions on adoption and I know it’s a hard thing to agree on. Some people feel open adoption is the only way and others feel they want nothing to do with it. It’s a matter of your personal journey. Sometimes things fall into place just right and you just go with it. I am sure some of those families that went onto adopting after this scam would say that they are hurt but they wouldn’t change that journey because they wouldn’t have their forever family now. The news shows have a good idea and it’s a good start BUT keep going and go deeper! Help both birthparents and adoptive parents go through this rough yet beautiful journey safely!!!
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