Friday, June 19, 2015

"I Am Adopted"

I was about 10. My grandma and I were riding in the car.
“I have something very important to tell you.”
“Okay Gramma.”
“I am adopted.”

I knew that when Gramma would talk about her parents it was like a secret. And her mother was German, but she was not. I had never met my grandma’s parents, they were older and had died long before I was in the picture.

Gramma cried. She was embarrassed, maybe even ashamed. There was some stigma attached to being adopted. I didn’t understand. It seemed clear to me. She had a lady that gave her life and another that was her mom. She had a family that was her own, regardless if she looked like them or not. She was loved and fed and cared for and cherished. She never understood that she was their dreams come true.

My great grandmother came over from Germany around 1917 at about 20 years old as a cook. She met and married the groundskeeper who has 10 years older than her. They tried unsuccessfully to have children and confided in their priest that they wanted a family. For many years they tried and prayed and tried and prayed. And they told anyone who would listen of their desire to have a family of their own. In an age of silence, they were not.

In March of 1928, their pastor met with them and said that a girl had been born at the hospital, no birth certificate, no parents, and this little girl needed a family. The hospital wasn’t too far and they would need to go get her as fast as they could.  They borrowed a car and drove 30 miles to the hospital by the beach, and then next day drove back. I can only imagine my great grandmother holding on to this squalling beautiful black haired baby…. And thinking .. my baby. My baby. My prayers were answered.

When I met my soon to be sister and brother in law and knew they were looking to adopt, I told them my Gramma’s story. And that I am a proud product of adoption, of hopes and dreams come true. Of answered prayers.

I love how they have open arms to the boys’ birth families. I love how they handle anything that comes their way. And I am a very very proud auntie to both of those little ones, because they share my DNA of dreams come true.

When I think of how far we have come when we create our families, I recognize that I am blessed. Blessed to be a product of adoption 2 generations back and blessed to see the open adoption my sister and brother in law have embraced. We are all blessed to witness these two little men trail blazing their way into an ever-widening family that is filled with love, support and communication. There is no shame in that.

Written By Kim
Sister in-law of an Adoptive Mom
Proud product of adoption!
Group supporter and cheerleader!

Join us at our next PRE/POST meeting on July 10, 2015

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